Never go to sleep angry, because you never know if the person you’re mad at will wake up the next morning. Always forgive someone. You never know if you’ll speak to them again. Get over it. It’s better than knowing you’ll never get to tell them you’re sorry, or that you still love them. It might be too late.
I like to spend Fridays tapping into why I tell my story in the first place, why I am so inspired to show others how to heal from their story and then how to share in an even bigger way so they can help more people.
Luckily when my mother was murdered by my father I had a great relationship with her so I didn’t move into guilt and shame and all the myriad of emotions that come from love not expressed, from judging others and/or from distancing ourselves.
But I have had life coaching clients who distanced themselves from parents as they should have (because their parents never showed any remorse for abuse), but then were afraid that the parent would die and they would feel guilty.
What I teach them is something I did to release my anger toward my father before he died so that when he did I was free of guilt (I know it makes no sense to feel guilty but emotions sometimes have no logic- have you noticed?)
1. Set a healthy boundary.
If your parent has never taken responsibility for their actions I wouldn’t suggest having them back in your life except in a minimal way and only if it is necessary.
2. Creative Visioning.
Remember them as a little child or as a baby when they couldn’t possibly have been abusive. More likely they were abused. Connect with that essence as a way to take in their God-like qualities so that you can find compassion for them…because that opens your heart to the loving.
3. Fiercely Connect with That Compassion.
When you think of them and perhaps get angry…bring forth this new compassionate side. It will help you to experience more joy and help you to move into acceptance of your self-honoring choice of limiting your time with them. That is an act of self-love. And so when it is time for them to pass on…there will be less or no guilt.
This is a way to change the story you are telling yourself about your relationship with and to them and that begins the healing.
Interested in more healing tips?
Fridays I’ll be focusing on them.
Monday is for miracles, the power of story, and some cool tips for making the biggest impact.by just being you.
In the loving,
P.S. Just have to share a couple of comments I received from students in my The Freedom to Tell Your Hero Story Master Class Series this week so they know how much they mean to me.
“If it wasn’t for you, I doubt I would ever be on this path to my highest aspirations”
“What a break through b/c of Brenda Adelman on my “why” in regards to my business practices. I discovered a direction I want to go with my business which is Super Great . I really Love how Brenda Adelman does her Magick!!