I LOVE Stability in relationships.
We all have different love languages and ways we express our love
that means something to us. Some people want to be told they are
beautiful and if they don’t hear it from their spouse/lover they
feel they aren’t being cherished. For others, words don’t mean so
much. They want to be shown one’s love with actions. If I am told
I am beautiful but my partner disrespects me with judgment of my
character than I don’t feel honored.
I’m fascinated by what attracts people together, has them stay
together and/or eventually part.
I’m going to be honest today and raw, since that’s who I am. I hope
that’s why you’re here… to join me in diving below the surface
into the place where Truth lives.
If you’ve known me for a while, worked with me or seen my solo-show
you know I don’t sugar coat anything. Being vulnerable can be
painful but I know without a shadow of a doubt that covering your
vulnerability is the worst thing you can do for yourself when you
are in pain and need support.
I won’t give details yet about my heartbreak because the heartbreak
I am dealing with is too close to the surface to share completely
(That’s something I speak to in my storytelling program: when to
share, how to share for the highest good of yourself and your
readers/ audience members) I haven’t yet
completed the work ahead of me to move to the other side of the
My goal …since my passion and work is about how to use your story
to heal from it and how to use forgiveness to rise above your pain
and create the life you were meant to live…is to share my Truth
here so we can connect authentically.
Someone very close to me has hurt me deeply. I’ve been betrayed and
lied to. And I’ve been swirling in a sea of instability, longing to turn
back the clock, make sense of the nonsensical and be thrown a life
The lessons are deep, steeped in pain and the awareness that I have
no control. It’s been a time that has forced me to release blame when
I don’t want to, allow the story I’ve been telling myself about
this person to lose it’s control over me and it’s a time to take my
own lessons that I have been teaching for years and apply them to
this new situation I am in.
I forgave the unforgivable in the past. I forgave my father for
killing my mother and marrying her sister (almost twenty years ago).
I forgave myself for trusting him. My ability to finally have the
courage and strength to forgive my father led me to my life’s work
and the opportunities I have had to spread forgiveness in this world by
teaching it on stages and in coaching.
I somehow thought that because of the depth of my healing that
relationship and my commitment to my inner work that I wouldn’t suffer
again….and yet I am…I have been betrayed again.
And I’m learning that perhaps I can be a better teacher and mentor
once I am able to integrate my new learnings.
Why did I create the relationship I did? What was the wounding I
came in with? Why have I made the choices I have that led me to
being blindsided? When did I give up my power to someone else?
I created a powerful program a couple of years ago all about how to
forgive yourself and love yourself despite the circumstances you
find yourself in. It truly is an inside job.
My program is called Opening to Love Weekend.
I know the exercises in it, ones I applied to the ‘big’ issue with
my father enabled me to find love and peace again all those years
ago when I was courageous enough to open my heart again.
I am going to work through that program myself next week.
If you are suffering, wanting to turn back time, not wanting to
attract another person into your life who might lie to you,
disrespect you, turn on you and shock you with their actions I
encourage you to do this program alongside me.
I will post my learnings as I move back into my love of self on my
forgiveness community page on FB. If you join me in the program
I’ll also be sending you personal emails with what I am learning by
re-doing my program and share the special things I am learning that
will take all your work deeper.
Here’s the link to sign-up and join me in Opening to
Love where our hearts with crack open and bottom line, you’ll
experience more peace today…not next week or next year. Your
will be stable.
In the loving,
Your Story Coach
P.S. What a few clients say:
“Brenda is an amazing coach. I feel lucky to have worked with her.
She was loving, kind, enthusiastic, intuitive, and at the same time
didn’t let me get away with not getting to the root of things. I
highly recommend Brenda to anyone who wants to let go of old stuff,
rewire their brains, and move forward in a big way.”
“Your course, it’s given me a lot of insight into how to deal with
certain issues in my life (I too need to forgive my father). I
never really realised how vital it is to forgive for our own sakes.